The day before we got the news of our assignment, we were driving home from Costco when it hit me. We had a 50 percent chance of going to South Korea. And suddenly, although I had been assured we would be headed to New Mexico, I felt certain that we would be in Asia by the following fall.
But instead of the panic and despair I expected in that moment, God gave me peace. And this girl, who once thought she’d never even leave Texas, was suddenly ready to spend a year halfway around the world.
During the following months, things seemed to continue to escalate with North Korea. Everyone I knew gave me the same look upon hearing our fate — their wide eyes and half-gaping mouths made their skepticism plain. They asked me, “Are you worried?” They thought, “Wouldn’t it be safer to stay in Texas with your family?” And you would think my immediate, honest answer would be yes.
Indeed, I have considered the worst case scenario of paying someone to smuggle me out of Korea on a fishing boat if everything went to hell and a hand basket before I could evacuate (hey, you’re the one asking if I’m scared). I have debated the likelihood that the US government would evacuate American families if they knew things were getting really bad. I have considered whether North Korea would be crazy enough to destroy South Korea with a nuclear weapon and wondered if the radius from their target would reach my future home. And you know what? I feel at peace.
I’ve certainly stressed over the logistics of getting to South Korea. An international move is nothing to shrug your shoulders at. I’ve cried in frustration over logistical matters gone awry.
But each thought about what I would do in South Korea given a worst case scenario felt rational, not panicked. You may think I am naive or perhaps even ignorant of what a nuclear weapon could do. You may think I’m putting my head in the sand and ignoring the reality of escalating tensions. And that may well be true. But those aren’t the reasons I am at peace with my decision to go to South Korea with my husband.
I am at peace because when I prayed about my fears of military life before I got married, God answered clearly that He was in control. I am at peace because I can look back on every assignment in my husband’s career knowing that it was exactly where God wanted us. I am at peace because even in the most horrific moments of my life, I have felt God close to me. Holding me. Shaping me. Preparing me for something better.My God is bigger than life itself, and I am not afraid to follow where He leads.Click To Tweet
And for whatever reason, no matter what happens in South Korea over the next year, that is where God has sent the man He made me for. He chose me to be a military spouse (despite how unprepared I was), and He chose us for this journey.
My God is bigger than North Korea. My God is bigger than a nuclear war. My God is bigger than life itself, and I am not afraid to follow where He leads.
So yes, as long as they’ll let me, I’m following my husband to South Korea. And no, I am not afraid.
12/8/2017: I’ve been living in South Korea for over a month now, and I am nothing less than amazed at God’s goodness. I’m still not afraid, despite the media’s best efforts to make me believe that the world is out of control and that I’m at the epicenter. God has not failed to give me peace here, or to show me kindness through our fellow military families and the people of South Korea. God is good all the time, everywhere we go, no matter what happens on earth.